The first time that I met you
you were very warm and kind
Toured me through your country
let me live the perfect life

But the one I fell in love with
often cried herself to sleep
She said how you belittled her
and made her vulnerable and weak

At first I struggled to believe her
yeah I surely had my doubts
but you showed me another side
when the circus had left town

You can be nasty to your daughter
act as if it's all ok
Your husband's never stepped in
he's just looked the other way

You give your boys all your attention
no there's nothing you won't do
It's when the doors were closed for others
I saw the real you

Think how her insecurities
stem from everything that you have disapproved
She's got so many other passions
but you like to pretend that she's like you

You say you'd rather had a boy
And I quote "You know, boys are more like me"
She wants to be appreciated
but a boy is something she will never be

And now there is your mother
who never took you for what you are
Project your issues on your daughter
all the time while I'd support her
I don't know why a mother would ever go that far

Daddy never says a thing
Daddy's said that he's aware
Daddy only has her back
As long as you're not there
I feel sorry for your daughter
'cause of all the things you do
I thought I had it bad
I thought I had it bad
I thought I had it bad
Til I met you

You're too busy with yourself
to notice how your family's ridiculing you
And who can really blame 'em
with all the crazy things you say and do

All your kids have called you psycho
when you're about to start a fight again
And your husband's seen it happen
but he never tries to stop your bullying

Then there is your daughter
who you never take for who she is
She's tried bonding with her mother
it's getting harder to support her
Don't you really see what happens
are you that oblivious?

You're creating all that drama
and you've got your whole charade
But everybody wants to
make it rain on your parade
I feel sorry for your daughter
'cause of all the things you do
I thought I had it bad
I thought I had it bad
I thought I had it bad
Til I met you

No one really likes you
they're just being polite
but the way you treat your daughter
has scarred her over time

So could you please just stop complaining
'bout how hard it is for you
no one wants to hear it
they've got better things to do

You say that you ain't perfect
but you can't point out your flaws
and your husband just agrees
'cause you're carrying his balls

I feel sorry for you daughter
'cause of all the things you do
I thought I had it bad
I thought I had it bad
I thought I had it bad
Til I met you

MOTIVATION

The first song written about the entire mess that was the family of my fiancee. I'd written a lot of stuff already back in 2011, especially the chorus, but never did anything with it as it lacked direction. Once I was no longer together with my fiancee I finished it and put everything together half a year later after I'd put the first words down to paper.

Being it all the things I´d wanted to tell her mom from the moment everything had started to escalate, it quickly turned out I had quite a lot to say. I was never allowed to say how I felt about her mom's actions due to my fiancee getting shit for it in return "You shouldn't be with him" were things her mom had said after finding out how I wasn't as fond of her as she thought I was, but it was quite easy to put everything together as a lot of it is just me describing what the situation was like. Some lyrics as shown in the handwritten lyrics I didn't end up using due to it not fitting with the melody or it not being the most important thing. "You tell your daughter that she's fat" was something she'd often say when they went shopping for clothes, and she was fully aware how her daughter really, really struggled to keep all weight off and how insecure this had made her. But anything to come across as superior ey, because mommy was skinny. She also didn't eat healthy and starved herself in order to look the way she looked, but none of that mattered. It's how it looks to the outside what counts, right?

My fiancee grew up with a mother who'd always wanted her to be a boy. She´s literally said that many times, hence me quoting her on this. My fiancee knew her grandmother and own mother could be nasty, and would be nasty if she´d step up to her own mom as well. She did this occassionaly but due to her dad never backing her up she never got anywhere. And once I stepped up, her own mother didn´t really talk to me, but instead gave her own daughter more shit.

I am positive would I have said several things to her instead things would've been different, but my fiancee did not want her mother to know the things everyone else knew, mostly because they'd seriously hurt her. There were various moments when my fiancee was up in tears, begging me not to say something after her own mother had just seriously hurt her. She did not realize however that by not telling her anything, the odd character that was her mother would only continue to have influence over her own daughter and would keep being a disappointment as a mother.

This amount of nastiness was something I'd never experienced before. You often think your own mother can be a disaster and I've sure had my problems with mine, but compared to this I am truly blessed. All I can hope for is that eventually people will step up to her because I've not heard anyone say that they really like her, and I don't get why they're so afraid of her. Her so called friends and family just put up with her, but talk about her in private and no one really likes hanging out with her. My fiancee was a much stronger woman than her own mother was, way more intelligent and had way much more going for her, but it's as if her own mother felt threatened all the time and just had to put her own daughter down to be sure everyone would love her as much instead. They never did, and never will.

EXPLANATION

The quote in the song "You know, boys are more like me" refers to a time when we were walking in Boston and my fiancee had previously talked about how her mother had always tried to treat her as a son as opposed to a daughter. While walking back to the car her mom said the direct quote out loud and the look on her daughter's face was devastating. I asked her if she wanted me to say something about it, but she wanted me to let it pass. A friend of her mom, who was also with us, laughed about it, not realizing how harsh the words really were, and how much she really meant of it. I did ask her mother to take back her words but she refused to do so, "because it was true, she never liked hanging out with girls".

Project your issues on your daughter refers to the serious mother issues she has with her own mother, and refusing to seek help for it, yet projecting every issue on her daughter and treating her even worse than her own mother had treated her.

"You can be nasty to your daughter" and "at first I struggled to believe her" refers to her always saying and doing things to her daughter only when she'd be alone with her, so that if her daughter would tell anyone it'd be very hard to believe. I picked up on this when I was asleep on the couch, woke up due to her loud voice and then overhearing a conversation she had with her daughter about a subject she'd talked about with me and claimed to have a very different opinion about than the one she was forcing down her daughters throat.

"All your kids they call you psycho" refers to a conversation I had in the kitchen and one of her sons laughing over something ridiculous she'd said, and me asking why they'd not step up to her. He laughed at off and said "yeah...I don't think you know how much my mom can turn into a psycho". The words were later repeated by another child of hers as well.

"She's tried bonding with her mother" refers to my fiancee really trying to bond with her mom, yet as soon as something became too girly, or too female-like the conversation came to a halt, thus my fiancee was never really able to have a woman to woman conversation. Her mom talked about men like men talk about women when they talk to male friends and her daughter was never really able to expres herself to her mom, because she'd always be critisized for what she was really like.

"Could you please just stop complaining" refers to 2 of her children asking her this several times, and then her mom throwing another hissy fit, because life in their household should very much be about her, and not about the family itself.